A little bedroom talk

I am learning, through the busyness of life with several little boys constantly running circles around us, the importance of making sure that there is a space that is for just us.

So, ladies (married ones that is... sorry if everyone else feels left out), how are you cultivating your relationship with the man who works so hard for you? The one who has loved you through every struggle you never expected and all that is better than good?

When we remodeled our bedroom last year I was thrilled over new, fresh, and warm paint colors. The restructuring of our room, which provided space for a walk in closet and corner jacuzzi tub made my heart all a flutter.

I knew it would be a wonderful change from the old, drab, plaster falling off look it used to have. - Besides that, I was determined that I would do better at keeping it tidy. I had allowed our room to be a catch all for the things I didn't know what to do with. It was rather unkempt, and was one of the least attractive rooms in the house.

What I didn't realize was the extent of the positive impact it would really have on us as a couple.

I remember when the final nail was secured and the last coat of paint was dried, we finally moved back into our room. We lay in our bed and looked around. We took it all in - from the new ceiling fan, gently rustling the crisp curtain behind us, to the lovely bronze waterfall faucet on our tub.

We grinned like silly children. "It's so clean. And peaceful", he said.

It was.

It became the place that the rest of the world could fade away for awhile.

And we found out time and time again that

...it was hard to stay made at each other in the peace of that room,

...when the rest of the house felt chaotic, our space being orderly and tranquil would give us just the rest and encouragement we needed,

...having a constant, familiar, sweet place for us has built us up and helped us to be able to face the big responsibilities that have been given to us.

I had heard it said before that clutter and lack of care to your bedroom can be a detriment  to your marriage. I don't think I took that very seriously. Obviously these are just outward things, and working on your marriage goes much deeper than a clean room. That is an obvious fact - but that being said, it truly does amaze me that these little intentional details can, indeed, make an important difference!

Of course all of our budgets do not allow for a complete bedroom overhaul (we had some blessed help and are incredibly thankful!) - but that is not the point. The point is this: putting in time and effort to make that space special. Caring. Investing.

Scented candles.

Keeping things clean, welcoming, pleasant.

Paying attention to things like lighting and eliminating clutter.

Soft music.

Making your bed every morning so that when you enter that space, exhausted and perhaps overwhelmed from a long day, you can just collapse into the softness of your bed.

Together.


Alone.


Do not neglect the investment of loving one another in the details.

When we shut that door each night we remember that before those precious boys came into our world (wish I could figure out how that happened) there was us. Us needs to be a priority before them. - Yes, some may disagree with me or perceive me as a poor mother for making such a statement. For real though - with out "us", where does that leave "them"?

Make it special ladies. Invest.