{The Heart of Worship}

I can't even begin to tell all that God is doing,

changing,

motivating,

moving,

molding,

romancing,

in my heart.


Some of it is small -

a little dusting off here,

a bit of sanding away there...


Some of it... oh my. Really big.


Right now I am in that processing phase;

This place where I just need to treasure-it-in-my-heart .

I have to mull over it all before I even begin to offer it up in a public venue, such as this.


But all that really matters? Right now I am finding myself at the feet of Jesus.

Over and over and over.

I am getting more acquainted with his heart. - And funny thing. It just makes me want more of Him.

I want to exchange milk for meat.

I want to deepen,

mature,

grasp for more.


grow up in grace and become all that I was meant to be.


He has put books in my hands that have been playing a part in the refining process.

The pile seems to be growing...

 and growing...

 and growing... :)

Every word I am reading is leading me in this direction of a reckless pursuit of God,

a tearing away of self.


To say it is exciting would be an understatement!

To say there isn't pain in the process would be a big.fat.lie.

Oh, but I know that God is going to use even the pain in amazing ways!


My mornings have been precious times. Some mornings are rushed and full of responsibilities,  and then I have needed to make some time in my evenings.


Speaking to my heart,

 fueling my passion,

highlighting my worship has been this soundtrack (Clicking on titles will take you to the you tube video. My comments in red):

Deep in Love with you
(lyrics are written by Michael W. Smith, Debbie Smith, Christa Black)

Sitting at Your feet is where I want to be
I'm home when I am here with You

Ruined by Your grace, enamored by Your gaze
I can't resist the tenderness in You

(I love that part!)

I'm deep in love with You, Abba Father
I'm deep in love with You, Lord
My heart, it beats for You, precious Jesus
I'm deep in love with You, Lord

Humbled and amazed that You would call my name
I never have to search again
There's a deep desire that's burning like a fire
To know You as my closest friend

Lord, my Redeemer, Your blood runs through my veins
My love for You is deeper than it was yesterday
I enter through the curtain, parted by Your grace
Oh, You're the lover of my soul
 **********************************************************************************
There is Nothing 
(Laura Story)

Lord I come before You
To honor and adore You
For who You are and all that You have done
Lord I am not worthy

My heart is dark and dirty
Still somehow You bid for me to come
(This part -SO true. 
So unworthy. 
So thankful for grace... I have no words)

[Pre-Chorus:]
So clothe me in humility

Remind me, that I come before a King
(How often we forget.. we are coming before a KING!)

[Chorus:]
And there is nothing
There is nothing
More precious, more worthy

May I gaze deeper
May I stay longer
May I press onward to know You Lord
(The cry of my heart)

[Verse 2:]
May our time be sweeter
May I be a keeper
Of the promises I make to You in song
Lord may I remember these moments of surrender
And live my life this way from this day on

[Pre-Chorus:]
So clothe me in humility
Remind me, that I come before a King

[Chorus:]
And there is nothing
There is nothing
More precious, more worthy
May I gaze deeper
May I stay longer
May I press onward to know You Lord
**********************************************************************************

What Do I Know of Holy
(Addison Road)

I made You promises a thousand times

I tried to hear from Heaven
But I talked the whole time
(Yes, that's me. -Learning to shut up and listen...) :)

I think I made You too small
I never feared You at all No
If You touched my face would I know You?
Looked into my eyes could I behold You?

(CHORUS)
What do I know of You
Who spoke me into motion?
Where have I even stood
But the shore along Your ocean?
Are You fire? Are You fury?
Are You sacred? Are You beautiful?
What do I know? What do I know of Holy?

I guess I thought that I had figured You out
I knew all the stories and I learned to talk about
How You were mighty to save
Those were only empty words on a page

Then I caught a glimpse of who You might be
The slightest hint of You brought me down to my knees
(Can you relate? I mean, wow.)

(CHORUS)
What do I know of You
Who spoke me into motion?

Where have I even stood
But the shore along Your ocean?
Are You fire? Are You fury?
Are You sacred? Are You beautiful?
What do I know? What do I know of Holy?

What do I know of Holy?
What do I know of Holy?
***********************************************************************************

Alive

(Natalie Grant)
Who but You, could breathe and leave a trail of galaxies and dream of me?

What kind of Love is writing my story till the end with Mercy’s pen?
(Is that not beautiful?!)

Only You.

What kind of king would choose to wear a crown that bleeds and scars to win my heart?
What kind of Love tells me I’m the reason He can’t stay inside the grave?
(Beautiful shattering pain...)

You. Is it You? Standing here before my eyes, every part of my heart cries

Alive! Alive! Look what Mercy’s overcome; Death has lost and Love has won
Alive! Alive! Hallelujah, Risen Lord, the only One I fall before
I am His because He is alive.

Who could speak, and send the demons back from where they came with just one Name?

What other heart would let itself be broken every time till He healed mine?
(This hurts, and heals)

You. Only You could turn my darkness into dawn; running right into Your arms

Alive! Alive! Look what Mercy’s overcome; Death has lost and Love has won
Alive! Alive! Hallelujah, Risen Lord, the only One I fall before
I am His because He is alive.

Emmanuel, the promised King the baby who made angels sing
Son of Man who walked with us, healing, breathing in our dust
The author of all history, the answer to all mysteries
The Lamb of God who rolled away, the stone in front of every grave

Alive! Alive! Look what Mercy’s overcome; Death has lost and Love has won
Alive! I am His because He is alive.
Alive!
***********************************************************************************



I could add alot - but I just wanted to share a little bit of my heart tonight.

{Much more to come}