Conversational blogging - just try to keep up

I'm getting hooked to vanilla wafers - and they must be Nabisco. No substitutes for this newest of delights. With ice cold milk? Yes please.

Next week is going to be constant. Maybe even a touch of insanity?  Yes - even more than usual.

Dave has softball tournaments Monday and Tuesday.

K has surgery (ear tubes...again) Tuesday morning. I think I may be losing count of his surgeries now. His ENT is concerned about what appears to be some fairly serious hearing loss in his left ear. Could be serious - or it could just be alot of wax build up. Okay, thankyouverymuch for making a mama crazy.

Wednesday I am taking K to his annual eye exam. We have been taking him to the best of the best pediatric eye clinic in several states (or so I've heard). It's an hour drive and usually about a 2 hour wait - totally worth it. Our insurance no longer covers them. We will be paying out of pocket this one last time and will definitely miss them!

Thursday is K's speech therapy.

Friday/Saturday is possibly camping and family reunion 2 hours away.

I love summer. Seriously - it is busy, but it is pretty packed with enchantments that one can not come by in the winter time.

We have new baby kittens and they are fluff balls of sweetness. The boys are in love.

K is still having "episodes" that are very seizure like, but have been formally diagnosed as migraines. His doctors can throw whatever diagnosis at him that they want to, but until they are cradling him in their lap trying to tell him everything is going to be okay and calming his trembling they can not understand. My gut feeling is telling me that we are missing something. Something isn't right. It just isn't.

I am consistently getting about 7 hours of consecutive sleep now. (Can I hear a hallelujah??)

Last night, while introducing myself to a group of ladies, I said I had five boys. I haven't done that in a long time. I then said "I mean I have four boys." And then I felt a little bit sad. I haven't felt that way in a long time. I know that I have five boys. I know that. But for practical purposes, I tend to tell acquaintances that I have four. It makes it a little easier. Less awkward. Less time consuming. And sometimes I feel like I am betraying him.

When Joshua died we were given a memorial plant. Something to put roots down. Something that will bloom every year and remind us of him. It's a Rose of Sharon plant and it is in full bloom right now. It is the most gorgeous and low maintenance plant I have ever seen. 

I'm utterly and irrevocably in love with my husband. He's very patient. He's incredibly forgiving.

I washed his phone a couple of weeks ago. I killed it. He was sad. He told me it was okay.

I missed a bill that was due last week. It almost doubled in overage charges. He called and told them we've never missed a bill before... we were on vacation... we were sorry... They removed the charges.

He lined up a babysitter for tonight. He asked me out. Like - on a real date. :) I'm a little giddy. Like a teenager. Only, I'm not a teenage and, in fact, am very rapidly approaching the end to my twenties. Some days I feel 19 still. I know, I know - very odd, but it is true. In February I will be 30.

My oldest sister is like a Betty Crocker. She has always been pretty domestic and creative. I keep thinking about the made-from-scratch blueberry pie and peach cobbler she made when we were in Iowa last month.

Yesterday I was not a good mama. I lost my patience alot. Too much. I really wished for a do-over day. I am so glad that we have new days for new beginnings and that His mercies are NEW every morning. Great is HIS faithfulness. I don't deserve it. It is great.

I recently finished a Bible study on Ruth. It was an in depth study of the kinsmen redeemer. It opened my eyes so much to things I had only thought I previously understood. I grew up in little Baptist churches where mostly hymns were sung. I would sing alot about being "Redeemed" - but it didn't mean a whole lot to me. Just another one of "those words". You know - Christianese. Through this study I was brought to tears as I realized what a big deal it is to be redeemed. And it is changing the way I live my life. Back in the culture of the Bible times a slave could be bought back from slavery by his closest relative. This freedom sometimes came at a great price. - How do you think that relative would feel if the slave would say "Thanks for paying that enormous price to make me free and all - but I'm pretty sure I want to live in slavery still. See ya, bye." No, not acceptable at all.

I don't think I lived worthy of the price yesterday.

Glad today is a new day.

Peace out.