Wednesday, December 2, 2009

 There may be a phrase in this post that makes you want to wash your eyes after they see it...

Can you be run down, exhausted, battling frustration and love your life all at the same time?? I'm going on the record as saying a big fat Yes! I have a cold. The "I'm not really sick, no fever- therefore I don't get to stay in bed, but kinda miserable enough to want to cut my head off" kind of head cold. I'm tired. I'm tired of potty training regression. An almost three year old who SO knows better and still insists on going to the bathroom IN THE FRONT PORCH. -Even when it takes longer to walk to the front porch than the bathroom. HELLO little buddy - MOMMY DOESN'T HAVE THE PATIENCE FOR THIS RIGHT NOW!! So, I am doing what any, at the end of her rope sane, mild mannered, patient mommy would do. Putting him back in diapers. Okay, just don't judge. I loathe cleaning poop out of underwear. Until he is really really ready, we just aren't doing this anymore. I have so many goals each day that do not get met. And that has been hard for me. But how can I get the floors vacuumed and mopped, the shopping done, professional looking cookies baked and decorated (hahahaha!), when I am cleaning all matter of grossness from my body, their bodies, and the floor? Sometimes it's when they don't make it to the bathroom, sometimes it's when I forget to grab a burp cloth - but so often in my day I am cleaning up, mopping up, scrubbing... stuff (and I really am trying to avoid using the phrase "cleaning poop out of underwear" again, because I know when you read that phrase in the previous paragraph you grimaced and wished you had never read that). And here is what is hard to understand: I absolutely love my life! I am crazy about these boys. I would clean up all sorts of nasty for the rest of my life if it meant I could be close to them, be the one who gets the home made ornaments, be the receiver of little boy hugs and sloppy kisses, be their mommy! On days when I feel the need to throw something or yell really really loud (wow, that would feel good!) I just need to reflect on how much I love this. How I chose this and would choose it all over again. How many people would give any thing for this -(well, minus the bodily function in the article of clothing...). How privileged I am. Welcome to my contradictory life. Thank you for being a part of this segment of time where I am reminding myself how much I love it. I'll check back later. I have some laundry to tend to... you know, those things with that stuff in them.

13 comments:

Amy@My Front Porch said...

I love reading about your crazy contradictory life -- because so often I feel the SAME WAY -- only I've just got ONE little GIRL, not four little boys. :)

And for the record, the poop in the underwear bit didn't even phase me.

Melody said...

This SO could be my very own post!! Minus a little less poop in the underwear ( notice, I said only a LITTLE less : )

I have an almost 4 year old boy, a 2 year old girl, and a 3 week old boy. I am struggling to adjust without losing my mind, and yet at the same time , like you, LOVE MY LIFE and feel so incredibly blessed!

Today has been a bit of a stressful day. I've been trying to put into words how I feel, and this post totally summed it up! Instead of writing my own post today, I think I will just put link to yours : )

I love the way you write....real and inspiring : )

This Heavenly Life said...

Hehe :) You are so right that it is still wonderful and amazing...no matter how far the poop flies.

Oh, and I think I'm immune to your poopy words, too. I live it every day, so reading it instead is actually refreshing ;)

Katie@The Baby Factory said...

It's hard to remember how much I love my life when I'm deeeeeep in the trenches of poopy diapers and screaming babies and 'discipline'.

Thanks for the reminder to reflect. It goes tooo fast. My first baby is going to be 2 far too soon. {sad} and your stinking song thing is singing 'remember when'...thanks for the tear fest ;)

austins mom said...

sounds like a day at my house! oh and do not stress. Austin wasnt potty trained until a month before he turned 4! my to do list just grows and grows and i rarely feel like I get much done. Just have to focus on the little things! like those sweet kisses!

Anne Elizabeth said...

Potty training can be so hard! I know you've heard my stories with my strong-willed daughter (who at this very moment is leading her brother around by a rope pretending he's a cat). She does GREAT now though and it was a crappy (literally) period that seemed to last forever but it did end! I promise he will get the knack of it. I have been known to throw out poopy underwear just so I didn't have to clean it.

Jenn @ A Country Girl's Ramblings said...

Go for the diapers! We have all been there and right now you need a break! He'll get it eventually, just not right now when everything is a bit different with a new baby and all. Hang in there!

Katarina said...

I love that you are loving your life, even in the midst of everything. It means that you are exactly where you are meant to be at this point in your life.
I *hear* you on the dirty underwear (mine was the closet (a few times) and not the front porch)
Praying that God continues to bless you with joy and love in the midst of everything.
And know that I have been there, you're not alone!

Barbie said...

Thank you for reminding me that there really is joy in the mundaneness of life. And potty training woes with boys...been there! My first son (now 15) was not fully trained until the age of...umh...4.5 years. And my second son, now 6, was only just trained a week before I threw him into Kindergarten. But yes, I love my life. Hang in there!

Stacey said...

You make me laugh! And that is always a good thing! This too shall pass and we'll miss it!!

Heather of the EO said...

Oh I KNOW lady!

ME TOO. Sicker than sick and still plugging along in my contradictory life :)

P.S. This is terrible...but I throw the poopy underwear out when it's really bad. I know that's wasteful and all sorts of wrong, but sometimes I just can't take it.

Lucas and Ang said...

I've thrown away underwear...sometimes it's just not worth it! I can totally relate...when you work all day cleaning and doing but nothing looks clean and done! Your post was a really timely reminder of loving MY life...I often compare my life to the lives of those around me and I feel like I must be failing...but you reminded me that we are all in this together, doing all the same stuff, and we need to remember to LOVE it!

Amanda said...

no grimacing from me over "poop in underwear"...just sympathy! :) i feel ya lady! this is SO life right now...definitely feeling you. some days are soooo productive and good...others feel like a complete waste. some moments i am treasuring the girls and their antics...the next moment i want to rip my hair out...and yet, i'm SOOO with you...i wouldn't trade it for ANYTHING. and i am soooo with you...no shame in reverting to diapers for the sake of sanity and avoiding poopiness! :)