Processing, stretching, and beauty

I feel like I am still processing so much - so much that has gone on this past week. The emotions were crazy. The original excitement, and then frustration, decisions, worry, stress, wondering, hoping praying, and then knowing. Knowing K was okay. Knowing that Malachi's lungs were developed enough for the outside world. Knowing that Dave would be there for his birth. And then finally knowing that Malachi was really on his way. And here we are. Starting on our new normal. Wow. A family of six. Stretching, growing, learning. Stretching. That word seems so appropriate right now. Our hearts have stretched to love four little boys beyond anything we ever thought was possible. Our lives have stretched as we incorporate a new little one and try to learn the best way to do all of this. My mind and body have been stretched as I learn to try to function on virtually no sleep. Managing recovery, added to getting nursing established, lack of sleep, and post postpartum hormones has been a stretch. I have cried when I held him and marveled at his perfection. I have cried when I've thought about all I want to do to care for the other boys and my household - and just can't do much more than nurse, drink, eat, and sleep right now. Such happy tears, and some times overwhelmed tears - even awe inspired tears. This stretching involves so much beauty. Breathless wonder. And let me tell you it can be painful to stretch too. God is so good. We are so thankful. We are thankful for this precious new life. We are thankful for all of the little adjustments that are taking place. We are thankful for grandparents who drove 9 hours to spend the weekend loving on little boys who have alot to process right now too. We are thankful for a church family that embraces and takes care of us. We are thankful for friends and family who rejoice with us and love on us. This has been an incredible week, and even though I am into that stage that can only be described as a "fog" - I am so very aware of the blessings being poured in to our lives right now. And oh my - Malachi is so beyond precious. - Even at 2 am when he decides to scream for a couple of hours. Even then. :)