Saturday, September 12, 2009

 What I'm learning; parenting

Sometimes you aren't going to feel like getting off the couch to follow through on an issue you have chosen to pursue with your child. Get up anyway. Sometimes you will be angry. And you will want to immediately react. - Not taking the time to take a deep breath, step back, and make a conscious decision to calmly respond to your child. The disrespect/disobedience/contrary attitude has lasted one time too many. And you.are.done Take a deep breath, step back, and make a conscious decision to calmly respond anyway. Sometimes getting down on the floor to be close to your child and just be will not sound real appealing. Sometimes getting down on the floor is hard to do physically. Sometimes you will have a million other things to do. Sometimes you just plain don't want to. Get down on the floor with your child anyway. Sometimes your child is going to need a consequence that hurts when they knowingly choose negative actions. Sometimes they are going to simply need to be held very tightly in an embrace. It is our job to know which one, what time, for how long, and why. Sometimes we aren't going to want to be the responsible one. Aren't we just kids too? Why do we have to step up and do the hard stuff? Because we are the adult. Because we have been entrusted with the most amazing gift any one could ever receive. Because every single thing we do and say affects them Sometimes they just need to hear "I love you" and "it's okay" and "I forgive you". Instead of "Why did you do that?!" and "Just stop! I told you a million times to stop, are you not hearing me?!" Sometimes we will feel woefully and incredibly inadequate. Some times we will have no clue what our next parenting step should be and when we should take it. Sometimes we need to change our strategy. Sometimes we need to throw every well meaning parenting tip we have ever heard right out the window. Sometimes we just need to go with that deep down intuitive feeling and forge an unknown path. Because the creator of these precious little ones has equipped us with every thing we could ever need to raise them. And I am going to need to re-read this so often, because I mess up on this stuff every single day. Thank you God for new mercies each and every morning...

8 comments:

Melissa said...

Again, a wonderful post Wendi.

Dana said...

Thank you for this- I always need to hear it. While I may know these things I still need to be reminded as I too slip everyday.

Katarina said...

Great reminder, thanks. Sometimes it's so easy to not do those things because it's been a rough day, week (hour) but it is important, so thanks :)

Melody said...

All SO true!! Such a good reminder!

Our oldest is 3.5 and up until this point we've been able to wing it pretty easily. The past few weeks have been a bit rough, full of tantrums. We've taken a step back, and are re-assessing our strategies. We're reading a few books, but mostly taking some deep breaths, trying to practice more patience and nurture this sweet little boy that God has entrusted us with.

Heather of the EO said...

I love this post.

Jamie said...

Good stuff!

Rachel @ Future Pastor's Wife said...

I'm bookmarking this because I need it every. single. day.

Amy@My Front Porch said...

I just came to your site via Rachel @ Musings of a Future Pastor's Wife -- I love your blog, and this post ESPECIALLY. Good stuff. I need to reread this often myself.