What I learned from a huge rusty radiator

{This is not a huge rusty radiator. This is the sound board at church.}

This guy…

I love him.

This week…

It's only Tuesday, and it feels very much like it should be Friday. Friday, or the next Friday. Guess who's spoiled? Me. I am. My husband works eight hours each day, five days each week. I know. Super cool. This week students are gone, so he gets to do big projects. He needs to take advantage of the time they are away and he can actually start and finish a job in one day.

Hey, that just gave me an idea. Anyone want some boys for a few days so I can, like, UNLOAD THE DISHWASHER, RE-LOAD IT, ADD SOAP, AND PRESS START all in one day?

Bless their hearts; those boys of mine.

Annnd backing it right back up.

So, this week Dave is cleaning carpets. Lots of them. As in, he is on his second 15 hour day.

And wow, I am in awe of this guy and his dedication to us. He works so hard. When he isn't at his full time job, he is usually serving/helping/ministering in some capacity.

Sometimes it isn't easy. And I'm not proud of this: sometimes I want him all to myself, and I find this selfish ugly wrap itself around my heart. So, my prayer has been that I would simply be the helper and encourager I was meant to be. It's an awesome thought that I can be a part of the process that God is actively involved in regarding Dave's heart and life. -That I can work in cooperation with God in encouraging him to be all that he was meant to be. I have seen God use him over and over. I have also recognized times that I have stood in the way of him being used by God, and I still shudder at that thought. I do not ever, EVER, want be a wall between this man and God. But I have to admit that keeping that perspective in amongst the crazy busy dailies of my life is tough.

I have to tell you a story. So, I went to the Center for Women retreat a couple of weeks ago. I get to go to the comfiest lodge for 24 hours with people who I work for and volunteer along side of at the Center. I get loved on, waited on, cooked for,  and All of Those Things. So sweet and refreshing.

Any time I am away for more than 2 or 3 hours, I know that I will be coming home to a trashed out house that is not in the same state I left it in. Just truth. {Five guys + me. It is what it is. I'm out numbered} So I was all psyching myself up for it, and praying on my way home. I knew there would be some dishes to wash and likely some clutter to manage. It was not lost on me that the boys were planning to put up our tree and decorate for Christmas while I was gone. I had not yet prepared a spot for the tree, nor really been ready for all of the decor to make an appearance, but I knew they would have a blast placing it all in odd and charming places throughout the house.

It was as I expected. Open bins, Christmas decor, tree, stuff where tree used to be stacked up and re-distributed. I climbed over a coffee table, and started looking for Dave. It took me a full 5 minutes to find him, but I finally did. In our upstairs hallway installing a large, rusty heat radiator. I knew that this was also an impending project, but I was not aware it would be in process this very weekend. While the boys were decorating. And All The Stuff was everywhere.

So, I did what any good, loving, respectful wife would do.

 I pouted. Big time.

And I didn't really even take the time to look at him. Like, really look at how hard he had been working. Look in those loving eyes. Those tired eyes. Dang, he probably experienced the inability to fill and start the dishwasher, so he went on to bigger and better things.

The guy had done a marathon project, that would be benefiting the entire family with more heat upstairs on this cold, cold {almost} winter.

I saw rust. And clutter. And coffee tables in the walk way.

He saw well fed, taken care of boys having a blast.
He saw a tree that I wanted up, finally up.
He saw the completion of a project that had been nagging him for a long time.
He saw warmth for the family he loved.

The next day I was relaying my dissatisfaction to a friend. And he nailed it. He said, "That man is a provider, everything he does is to provide for his family"

And wow, that has stuck with me. Seriously cured the pout.

I opened my eyes and every time I turned around he was meeting needs and providing. It may not be in my "love language" or in the order of my priorities. But I am so grateful for this provider I have been given. I don't think he knows how not to provide. It's innate and ingrained into who he is.

And yes, we had good talks about priorities and love languages and, you know, painting the rusty radiator. Big Stuff like that.

Right now, he's still at work. And I am warm and cozy in the home he is providing for us. Heating this house with wood is not a simple, fun hobby. It takes so much time, dedication, and work. This huge rusty radiator is just about the comfiest thing I've ever had in my house. You know, second to the guy who installed it. ;) Lucky me.

Blessed. Really, I am blessed. Love you, babe!