Sunday, September 14, 2008

 Parenting - alot of give and take

Today is a dark and rainy day - again. It's the third one in a row just like this. The boys are making it obvious that they are done with being cooped up inside of the house. We also have continued to deal with illnesses. K was kind enough to share his digestive malady with me. Jay and Noe have runny noses. I also am fighting off a nasty outbreak of poison ivy. I have no idea where it came from and why in the world it showed up where it did. The left side of my neck and collar bone is covered in it. Maybe I should stop making those organic necklaces out of the pretty weeds with three leaves or nuzzling those trees out back... ;) Today the boys and I are staying home from church due to our less than great health. I miss adults. :) Fortunately I am doing somewhat better today. Yesterday I could hardly move off from the couch. But I did. You know how as a parent you are sometimes pushed to physical and mental limits? That has been me recently. :) Dave had to run in to Home Depot yesterday and since I wasn't feeling well he asked Jay to accompany him. He knows that eliminating Jay from the mix here at home cuts my work load down considerably. Jay had just discovered Dave's old play station and was quite mesmerized with the micro machines game (so rad). He wasn't sure he wanted to go, in light of the amazing animated little cars. So, a surprised Dave went on to ask K if he wanted to go. K is just about the polar opposite of Jay in that he is a home body. :) His favorite thing ever is watching his DVD's , singing, and dialoging along with them. So, we were again surprised when K enthusiastically said he would love to go with Dave. Well, then Jay decided that he really wanted to go. All the while little Noe is grabbing for his shoes and anxiously trying to stick those chubby feet inside. He loathes being left behind while the 'big boys' hang out with dad. Because he is the baby (low man on the totem pole and all...) he has experienced that a time or two. So he was desperate that this time be different. "Ba-bye wit Dada! Ba-bye wit Dada!" was his desperate cries. Dave was standing there at a loss. Sweet man! He had promised Jay a trip into town, thought he would stay home with the play station, then was taken up on the offer. He had asked K to go when he got the negative response from Jay, and had never asked Noe to go. He really didn't want to leave me here with all of the boys in my state of illness. He really couldn't take more than one boy though because he needed to have his hands free to push a large flat bed cart full of his supplies. He was just standing there like "Now what do I do." I was semiconscious on the couch half way watching the whole humorous episode. Let me just say we are not at all condoning a child led house hold. :) Our boys don't just get to do whatever they want. Typically when they say no to some thing, then change their minds, too bad. They are learning about the impact of their own decisions, so once they decide -that's it. In this particular situation though Dave had promised Jay a trip to town and had switched car seats over, prepared for it and wanted to keep his word. He had also promised K. We are firm believers in being parents of our word. Building trust in these guys is a high goal of ours. If we don't think we will be able to follow through we will neither offer it nor threaten it. :) So, this sweet daddy is standing there looking all compassionate and befuddled. It is so rare that K actually wants to go do something, that we are really wanting to nurture that and allow him to do this, but even just having K along would have required a cart just for him in addition to the big one for the supplies. Although Dave is a super hero to all of us, he just didn't have the amount of hands needed to accomplish this as well as gathering his supplies. As I began to peel myself off of the couch Dave and I made eye contact and just began laughing so hard we couldn't stop. We both knew what the solution was going to end up being and we were cracking up over the absurdity of parenting. The laughing only intensified my stomach ache. So, a sick mommy and a sweet daddy took three happy little boys to town. As we were strapping K's new DAFO's (photo explanations of DAFO's here) onto him we realized that since we just went up a size, his old shoes would not fit over them. That made it necessary to make one more stop. New shoes for K. Who knew what we were getting into when we decided to become parents... :) Through out our Home Depot stop I used the cart to help hold me up. I got a few looks as we strolled through out the store. "Should she be here? Is she okay?" type looks, and this time they were warranted (Unlike the time I wrote about here. :). One of the strangest things about it all was the happiness factor. I felt like crap. Dave had a bunch of stuff he needed to do. But we held hands in the van as we drove and we laughed about nearly every thing. The boys all had huge smiles. I spent the rest of the day on the couch, Dave got alot done, and the boys all napped marvelously. Such is life. Such is parenting. Alot of give. And give, and give. And every now and then you get to take - a nap. :)

17 comments:

BaronessBlack said...

Bless you! Lovely post - Hope you feel better soon!

Jackie @ Our Moments Our Memories said...

Yep...a lot of give, and give and give. But such sweet reward in return. Love your attitude and perspective, even when your sick and leaning on a cart at Home Depot for support. :)

Lena said...

I have been sick lately too... and I totally understand! Parenting is an everyday adventure... one in which we can look back and laugh about. You get better!! :)

Ashley said...

What a tough mama you are! I would never be nice enough to do that.
I love how you just found the joy in the moment though...something we all need to do more of.:)

Smilingsal said...

You and hubby have a lot of love for each other and for those boys. :-)

Hey, if you're interested, my church has an internet connection. It's live stream. I have a link on my sidebar, so next time you stay home, you can still go to church!

mudpies4all said...

I love your perspective on life... so sweet and thoughtful and uplifting! I hope you are feeling better soon. ~Dawna

dani said...

wendi,
i hope you are ALL feeling better soon:) under the circumstances, it sounds like everything turned out very well!!!
take care.
love,
dani

Anne Elizabeth said...

You are such a good mom to take your kids out when you felt so sick! I pray you feel better soon. I bet when your kids are grown they will look back on the fact that you took them out when they were sick. I know that I look back a lot in regards to sacrifices that I know my mom made for me.

MoziEsmé said...

Sweet sweet post! Hope you're feeling better soon.

Amy said...

We have been fighting illness at our house this week too. God bless you, and I hope everyone feels better soon. A lot of times we have to keep doing when we are weak, yet in those times we may experience some of the greatest blessings. God is so good to us when we least expect it.

BaronessBlack said...

Apropos of nothing, I was just wondering – how do you manage your kids in church? I seem to spend all my time hovering at the back trying to participate, but still be able to get a screaming child out of earshot as quickly as possible. Any tips? Cheers!

Anne Elizabeth said...

Working on an old house can be REALLY discouraging. I feel inspired when I see what you guys have accomplished! So we inspire eachother:)

creative gal said...

I am sorry about the poison ivy. Hang in there and feel better soon!

creative gal said...

I forgot to tell you that "GET OUT OF THAT PIT" is one of my fav. Beth Moore books! Our bible study group is going to do her Esther study when it is releasd! :o)

Becoming Me said...

Bless your heart. Loved your ending!!

Cindy said...

What a trooper mom!!!!!
I'm glad you got to park it after you got home. Sick mommy's rarely get to rest.
Hope you are feeling better today.
Blessings, Cindy

Elizabeth said...

you're so right...lots of give but the true "take away" is just amazing!