30 Days of Thankfulness; Day 30

Dear November,

It's been good.

No, I mean it. It's been really, really good.

And oh, how you chose to go out! What a marvelous wintery white day! -A snow day in which the boys awoke on their own (the joy of not being awakened by mama hurrying you around!) and the curtains were pushed aside to show them the wonder that their world had become. No school was certainly icing on that cake!

This day has been a sweet representation of this month.

November, you have taught me much about thankfulness. I thought I was thankful before, and I was -  in a "oh, we always have food on the table" kind of a way.

But the past 30 days have been more about pausing, reflecting, and finding the beauty in all of it.

Today: Thankful hardly comes close. It was beautiful! I was up at 5:45 and soon after, got the message that all area schools were closed.

I got some laundry done and had some sweet time with my Bible, highlighter, journal, and pen (*happy sigh*).

One by one the boys began to get up. Those bed head sporting, eye rubbing, little men bobbling down the stairs with confusion on their faces, as to why mama had not awakened them, made my smile wide.

I just turned around and opened the curtains. The sun was arising with these glowing beams of pink and a tangerine orange color. It made the snow sparkle - as if it just couldn't wait to reveal itself to the boys of the house.

And I thought my smile was huge.

After telling the boys there was no school,

 ("At all today?! Are you sure?! NONE?!"), 

I whipped up some baked oatmeal. There was such a festive excitement in the air.

Oh, and it was pretty loud.

The Green girls risked their lives out on the highway to come see us and our kidos played together out in the lovely winter wonderland.

It was good. And I am thankful!

Visiting with a dear friend, sipping warm beverages, talking about thankfulness... How very fitting.

When Dave got home we waited for Kai to wake up from his nap, and then headed out to a Christmas tree farm down the road. For the first time we picked out our own growing tree, and cut it down. Fun stuff!

K loves all things Charlie Brown. You can probably deduct why this photo was taken. No, this did not end up in the back of our truck. :)

Poor Lil' Kai was nearly hip deep in snow, in some areas, so I picked him up and we made a big deal about every tree we saw.

The sun was setting and the entire area smelled like Christmas.

Thankful. It's becoming more and more like a heart beat instead of a choice.

Our next stop was to buy more lights, giggle at the silly santas, and ogle the sparkling pre lit trees at Lowes. We finished out trip to town by swinging through the Little Ceaser's drive through (You gotta love a hot n' ready pizza on paper plates some nights...).

After dinner I started in on the second half of the 8 dozen cookies needed for our Mom2mom cookie give away and cookie exchange tomorrow morning.

Insert fact: Eight dozen is alot.

The boys helped cut sugar cookies out for a while, but then it was bed time, and since we can't count on every day being an enchanted winter wonderland of sleeping in and no school, they really needed to get to bed.

I just watched the lighting of the Rockefeller Christmas tree and am in process of painting all of these cookies.

I have much to be thankful for. And the past 30 days have given a jump start to some really important things in my heart.

30 Days of Thankfulness; Day 29 {Thankful for some down time}

I am learning a new photo editing program, so today I thankful to have such great technology at my fingertips. It takes me a while to learn new things. I'm hoping to pick up on all of this quickly to get through the work that is waiting to be completed.

Today: I am thankful for some down time. I am so glad that Tuesdays continue to be a lull in my week. It is the only day that has more than a couple of hours of down time.

I am grateful today for a sub, working as Caleb's one on one aid at school, who he just adores. He is doing so well with all of the changes he has had to face this year, and I am proud of him. We have very grateful hearts concerning all who give him the extra help he needs in school! We are so blessed.

I am thankful today for Christmas music.

I am thankful for coffee. I hesitate to put that, because I'm pretty sure in the last 29 days it has made it into at least 2-3 posts. I don't want to be redundant on the blog... but it is what it is. I am redundantly thankful for coffee, and there is no sense in hiding it.

I am thankful for our bedroom, and what a relaxing oasis from the "crazy" that it is. The remodel we did two years ago was alot of work, but so very worth it! I may have locked myself in there with a book and steaming tub filled up to capacity this evening while Dave controlled the chaos downstairs. And by controlling the chaos, I mean played Wii.

I am thankful for my crock pot. There's just nothing like being able to take care of, and then forget about, supper by 7:30 am...

30 Days of Thankfulness; Day 28 {Thankful for succesfully hitting the ground running}

Today: Realty. Monday. Routine. Unpacking. Catching up. Balancing the check book.

Whew.

So grateful for motivation in getting things done that needed done.

A simple statement, but a big deal to me.

By noon there was fresh milk, bread, cheese, and cereal in the house, AND you you could see my kitchen floor.

This is the floor where everything was dropped last night. All of the suitcases, bags, food items, and various strange paraphernalia that accumulates during a trip. It was just dumped onto my kitchen floor in tiredness. This is the post trip routine, and often you can not see my kitchen floor for a few days. Thus, the thankfulness over the ability to not only see my floor, but to see that it was vaccumed and mopped.

I am grateful for Dave's flexible schedule and for today being a day to stay home and study all day long. Studying just didn't happen for him while on vacation, so he made up for it while I unpacked.

I am thankful once again for Arlona's willingness to step in so that I can step out. Another night at the Center for Women, and ministering to three women in particular tonight.

Grateful for friendships here, even as I am a bit wistful for the ones I have just come away from.

Thankful for Hannah, and some great talks with her tonight.

Thankful for those who make here even more homey for me.

30 Days of Thankfulness; Day 27 {Thankful for tender hearts and home}

Today: I am thankful for being semi organized and packed up by a decent hour.

I am thankful for memories made.

I am so glad that my boys are becoming closer and closer to their cousins. This makes it hard to leave for them, but we try to show them the good.

Noe and Jay both had tearful heartaches on the way home.

Crying quiet tears and trying to articulate what was in their hearts.

"Mom, I wasn't ready to come home"

"Mom, I don't understand why we don't live in Iowa"

"Mom I miss Aaron!"

"Mom, why do we live so far away from Grama Pat?"

"Mom, my tummy feels funny and I am so sad".

Ahhh - signs of love in the little ones hearts and opportunity to talk through feelings.

I used to go through this every time the trip was made.

Asking many of the same questions myself....

But then God did an amazing work in my heart.

He helped me to trust him more and more and to see that home was where He placed me.

Home was where I was serving with my whole heart.

Home was where my man was and home was where ever He asked me to go.

But these little ones... they are where I was at a few years ago.

I try to treat each question, each tear, each concern, with grace upon grace.

"Yes, I know. I get it. I understand. Let's talk about it. I'll tell you, and you can tell me, and we can tell Him".

I am thankful for a very safe and experienced driver for a husband. Years of over the road trucking give a certain intuition that is appreciated. The interstate was busy today; very, very busy. We were safe and arrived home in about 9 hours.

And at the end of it all was home. Our home. Waiting for us with that smile of brick and windows.

God has been good to us.

30 Days of Thankfulness; Day 26 {Thankful for their 40 years}

Today: I am thankful for a morning photo shoot with my sister, brother in law, and three nephews. For an accelerated Christmas card design session, and being able to do what I love with my family. - And of course, grateful for an understanding sister when we noticed that not even one of the photos presented us with every one looking at the camera and smiling...

I am grateful for the opportunity to see some of Dave's family as well, and another reminder of the many who love us and who are loved BY us.

So, so thankful for Dave and Mike... and their understanding and willingness to watch 7 boys (s e v e n!!) for 4 hours so that Trish and I could catch some girl time, shopping + Starucks + laughing so hard we may have gotten a few strange looks.

And today, especially, I am thankful down deep that my parents stayed together. Today we celebrate that. We know that being married is hard. It's sweet. There is nothing like the companionship and incredible sharing that we gain when we are married. But, seriously, we know it takes work every day.

And they have worked at it. We know their story. We know it got hard. And here they are.

So we rented a room at Pizza Ranch, My oldest sister April made a beautiful cake, we all gathered in and presented them with our gift - a boat ride on the Mississippi at the time of their choosing - and we celebrated.

{So thankful!}

30 Days of Thankfulness; Day 25 {Thankful for friendships that last}

Today: I am so thankful for the relationship I have with my sister. For late night talking, and just soaking up the time of being in the same state, indeed, the same house!

I am grateful for friendships that last for years... and picking up right where we left off. So glad to call this sweet girl my friend, and for the heart understanding that we share. Seeing her today, and her newest bundle of sweet baby boy, was a treat!

Thankful for seeing my mom and dad again, and their generosity in loading us up with a central air set up that they no longer had a need for.

I am even thankful for the silly fact that I lost my voice today... because really, it means that I have been sleeping little and chatting it up much. It is inconvenient, and makes parenting rather tough, but I'll take it.

30 Days of Thankfulness; Day 24 {Thanksgiving day 2011}

Today: Thanksgiving day.

So much to be thankful for! I am tired and happy and truly, truly thankful.

Today: I am thankful for food preparation at my brother and sister-in-law's house and much peeking out the window to see when my parents would arrive.

Today: I am smiling about the plans we have been making behind my parent's backs for the past couple of months. I am thankful for siblings working together, even when it got tough.

I am thankful for the love that we share, and most importantly, our unified desire to honor my parents this Thanksgiving, and two days after this Thanksgiving.

On November 26th, 1971 my parents got married. Forty years is a big deal. A big deal that says, "No, we won't just celebrate it at Christmastime, like mom suggested. :) But we are going to work it out so the whole family can be together this Thanksgiving and this November 26th to celebrate all of the good. All of the reasons to be thankful".

I am thankful for the smiles on their faces and the love that surrounded all of us.

I am thankful for bacon in green bean casserole and three different kinds of cheesecakes. Yes, I am. *wink*

I am grateful to God for the amazing weather he gifted us with today.

I am thankful for cousins playing, Kai napping on Dave's chest, and hours with my family, who I so rarely see.

So much to be thankful for.

30 Days of Thankfulness; Day 23 {Now that the secret is out I can write about it}

Today: I am so thankful for safety on the roads. Driving between Michigan and Iowa is something we have done many, many times. It almost feels like our vehicles could be put into gear and just do this path by themselves.

And yet, I never want to take for granted the many times we have safely arrived there and back.

Today: I am thankful for the 9 hours in the truck and the family time.

I am thankful for little boys who have been doing this trip since most of them were only weeks old, thus getting very used to it.



I am so grateful that Dave put those extra tools in at the last minute, as we were driving out of our driveway, and I am grateful for the ease and speed at which those tools helped him change our tire just outside of Iowa City.

I am thankful for my sisters warm and welcoming home and the excitement that is brewing.

30 Days of Thankfulness; Day 22 {Thankful for anticipation and a hubby who can fix pretty much anything}

Today: I am thankful for the excitement that is floating around this house.

Did that excitement make some little boys have massive mood swings,

and were the down swings barely tolerable for this mama??

Indeed.

But I will focus on the excitement... I truly am thankful for it!

I am glad that today was the last day of school for K and Jay, until next Monday. Meaning we will be spending a few relaxed days together as a family. That makes my heart very, very happy.

I am so thankful that before he went to work, Dave noticed that the pump on our outdoor wood burner, our main heat source, was not working properly. I am grateful for his seemingly limitless practical knowledge and how quickly he was able to get it fixed right up.

The wonderful, cozy, heat in our home is something I am daily thankful for in the winter. We are so blessed!

I could not forget to be thankful for much productivity today! I had alot that needed to be done. Right now it is 7:49. My house is quiet. Most of my to do list has been completed. I'm hard pressed at the moment to think of a more satisfied feeling.

I just have to add this very superficial thought for the night: I'm really thankful for chocolate. It would be a big ol' lie if I didn't write that in here some where. ...And I am so grateful for a sweet man, I can call mine, who is skilled in all things cooking/baking, and picks up well on hints... ;)

{Feeling blessed!}

30 Days of Thankfulness; Day 21 {Thankful for mental notes sticking and for humor}

Today: I am very grateful for my dad. For the day of his birth and all of the wonderful things that his life means to all of us.

I am thankful that I remembered every thing I needed to remember in this super packed day. Seriously, there were so many mental post-it-notes covering my brain... and I don't have the greatest track record when it comes to mental notes.

I remembered Noe's muffin mix he needed to take to preschool

I remembered K's plastic cups he had to take to 2nd grade.

I remembered that Jay's reading log was due today.

I remembered to call in K's prescription today and pick it up (double score!!).

I remembered to drop 2 photo CD's in the mail and two bills that needed to be paid.

I knew where my keys were at all times today (sadly, this is noteworthy...).

I remembered that Dave had signed up to bring supper to his class tonight, and made stuffed shells, plus potato soup for the boys and grandma.

Sent emails that needed attention, looked over homework that needed to be done, and crossed several things off my to-do list.

I went to the Center for Women, but remembered that I had to leave an hour and a half early to pick Jay up and take him to his Thanksgiving play. I remembered my camera to take pictures of him in said play (not so noteworthy whatsoever. It hardly leaves my side. Apparently camera >keys). 

Whew. Thankful for all of that!!

I am laughingly grateful for the sense of humor that this family has. So very entertaining every single day! I'm still laughing over Jay's words about my hair. "Mom, it's probably good that you had to stay home from church yesterday with K and Kai. You probly would have been embarrassed to go. You know...

(*whispers loudly behind his hand*)

"about your hair!"

I couldn't stop laughing. I said, "Jay, it really isn't so bad!" And his lovely reply, "Mom, it's pretty weird...".


Love that kid.

So... here it is. And I have to be honest. It's even brighter/more unnatural looking in person...

It's kinda growing on me though. Don't tell anyone...

30 Days of Thankfulness; Day 20 {Thankful for cuddles and days at home}

Today: I am thankful for the mixed blessing that is sick kids.

Of course I do not want my little ones to be unhealthy and uncomfortable. But sometimes sickness does slow us down, just as we need to be.

There are no fevers here, just a wheezing baby and a coughing, runny nosed K. I am thankful for soft tissues. I am thankful that our insurance company saw the wisdom in getting us our own nebulizer. We use that thing so often. It is very helpful in putting this mama's heart to rest when I am able to get medicine right into their wheezing lungs!

I missed being at church this morning, but I am so grateful for a ponytail, sweatpants, cuddle day.

I am grateful for my 2 year old's "Up mama, uhhhppp!" And the laying down of his head on my chest. Oh my, is that my favorite!!

Grateful for hours to spend editing and finishing up some clients photos. I hate making people wait, but the past couple of months have been so busy for our photography business.

And for that I am so grateful. 

I'm not sure specifically what I expected when Kristin, Hannah, and I started this creative adventure, but suffice it to say my expectations have been exceeded! Just knowing that people trust me to capture their moments and preserve their memories is an honor to me.

I'm so thankful for feeling more rested today than I have felt for a very long time.

I'm loving time with my boys. Laughing so hard with K, while putting animal puzzles together, that we are rolling around on the living room floor. His laugh... man, if you haven't heard it you have missed out on something beyond precious...

I am thankful that tonight's menu lists our favorite soft pretzel's and mozzarella sticks. It's going to be good!

30 Days of Thankfulness; Day 19 {Thankful for getting needed chores done, and that the color red will fade}

Today: I am thankful for not having to awaken to an alarm (!). Let's just let that one sink in for a while...

*Super happy contented sigh*

I am so thankful for a hardworking husband, who finally had some time to get some much needed projects done around the house and yard.

I'm thankful for my washing machine. The "large capacity" alone is enough to make me do a happy dance.

I am grateful for a day to get caught up on on a few things that had been looming menacingly.

I am thankful for friends who ask me to be their photographer. I love that.

I am grateful for the financial means to stock up on food for my boys.

I am happy for shopping trips alone. Radio turned up in my mini van on the drive there and back, and no one grabbing all things eye catching and sugar infused at the stores. Heavenly.

I am thankful for a husband who is willing to be my very own personal hair coloring stylist... ;)


And... I am grateful that when "dark auburn" is actually "Unnatural flaming red" I only have a couple of weeks to wait for it to fade to a nice... dark auburn. 


Hehehehe ..... ah, I love my life.

30 Days of Thankfulness; Day 18 {Thankful for the strain that causes growth}

One thing that is a little bit hard about this 30 days of thankfulness thing is that I am journaling my thankfulness every single day - meaning that, if I am honest, I will be journaling through some hard stuff as well as really good stuff. ... And taking all of you with me through the up's and down's this whole month. That makes blog journaling every day challenging and revealing.

It's part of the whole exercise of this though; helping me to see the truth of 1Thessalonians 5:16-18.

16 Always be joyful. 

17 Never stop praying. 

18 Be thankful in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you who belong to Christ Jesus.

Tyndale House Publishers. (2004). Holy Bible : New Living Translation. "Text edition"--Spine. (2nd ed.) (1 Th 5:16-18). Wheaton, Ill.: Tyndale House Publishers.

That  "Be Thankful in ALL circumstances"... is a challenge. I am learning more and more about what this means.

 I used to think I had to be thankful for everything. Like - huge grin, over joyed about every.single.crazy. thing that happened.

No. :)  

It's more of a "Even when hard/crazy/unexpected things happen retain your thankfulness". Maybe not necessarily directly related to the hard/crazy/unexpected circumstances...but just our over all joy.


The joy of our salvation. If we had the correct perspective, that would be enough. Overflowing, bringing us to our knees - enough.

Gratefulness for all we have been given. So much we don't deserve. 

I believe this is what those verses mean.

Not, "I am so thankful that my 2 year old just coughed so hard he threw up during lunch time! This is fantastic!"

But, "Wow. That was not how I thought our lunch time was going to go. That wasn't cool. But, I am not going to allow a bad attitude about the yucky clean up job awaiting me to rule my heart. There is way too much good in my heart to have any room for complaining!"

Make sense?

Okay, so to my thankfuls...


I am so thankful for my Noe B and his sweet little preschool Thanksgiving feast. Complete with cheese, crackers, fruit, and every delicious pie you could think of. So grateful for these memories in the making. My 4 year old (for only another month!) reciting poems with hand motions and nervous glances, hoping he is saying it all right.


Thankful that we were seated next to a dear friend, who I just don't get enough time chatting with anymore.


 I am grateful that Dave and I had made plans to go out together tonight. And that we stuck to our plans. The past couple of days have been hard for us... and date night seemed like it could be more challenge than fun tonight. Alot of work. Conversations we didn't necessarily want to have.


I feel like when we hit the one year mark of Dave being in school we hit a bit of a wall...


It seemed to all just pile on us. The amount of time he has had to spend studying. The dwindling hours that we have spent together as a family, and together as a couple. The added strain. It all just kind of hit home. There was this weariness that settled around us. 


That led to what I think of as "weeds" popping up in our relationship. Things that aren't inherently bad... but could potentially lead to a downward spiral. Little red flags, signaling that maintenance was needed.


So we went out for pizza. Amazingly delicious Chicago style deep dish pizza, I might add.

I am thankful for an evening of just the two of us. Time to talk, even though it was neither fun nor easy conversations. I am thankful for a date that was part loving togetherness, and part pain.

I am so grateful that we have something to fight for.


I am thankful for tears that cleanse, and for delicious food. At the same time. 

 I seriously was getting a little weepy in our booth at the pizza place, and in mid sentence said, "Wow, this is amazing pizza!" And of course that made us laugh and was just good for the soul...


I am grateful for a willing grandma babysitter, a quiet house, boys asleep, and much needed rest.

Today: I am so grateful for my marriage. For a man willing to work through some of the tough stuff of life. Listening to me, caring about my feelings, and urging me to grow.

30 Days of Thankfulness; Day 17 {Thankful for Technology, even though sometimes I want to use profanity when dealing with technology}

Today: I am so thankful for the ability to instantly take digital images, retouch them, and burn them onto discs.

To be able to log onto this web of world wide proportions, and chat with someone hundreds of miles away.

To order handmade gifts within minutes.

And Pandora? Thankfulness for intuitive internet radio may seem superficial, but lets be honest, I am {thankful... not superficial. Most of the time.}

Gee, I love technology, but not as much as you, you see.... {Extra points if you can identify this movie line}


Why yes, I was frustrated with technology not living up to my expectations today.

Why would we take over 2 hours to burn a DVD, now? NO reason.

Why would we freeze up every few seconds?

Why must we fight?

Why do we taunt each other so? What a love/hate.

Oh, and really? Since when does a camera upgrade mean that our photo editing software is now obsolete?!

That's fighting dirty, and it's not really fair.


And upgrading the photo editing software nearly making my laptop obsolete?!


No, no, no. None of that.


Of course I can't play that game. I would never be able to afford that game.


Even through the name calling and gigabyte slandering, I truly am thankful for the modern strides in technological advances.

Perhaps I just need a Mac?

Moving on...

Today: I am thankful for a large jacuzzi tub in our bedroom. I don't know if it was technology's fault or not, but I ended up with some form of a pulled muscle in my back. Not cool.

Right now picking up K or Kia is not feeling super.

The jacuzzi tub was amazing and wonderful. I never thought I would have something like that in my bedroom.

And I am so thankful!

Now on to the heating pad and more thankfulness for electricity!

30 Days of Thankfulness; Day 16 {Thankful for tangible provision and intangible grace}

Today: I am ever so Grateful for God's provisions.

Grateful for Sam's Club and super sized... everything.

Grateful for a new pair of fluffy slippers.

And so very thankful that God can use me in Wednesday night church ministry in spite of being rushed, struggling through evening chaos, and an all around bad attitude. 


His grace is something I can't touch, or see, or quantify.

I know it is very big though. It has to be to continually pull my heart out of the muck of this world and back to the purity of Himself. It just has to be.

And that makes me thankful.

30 Days of Thankfulness; Day 15 {Thankful for my Jay}

Today: I snuck him out of first grade just a wee bit early.

I wondered if he would remember - we had plans.

But didn't have to wonder for long, because I saw this wavy blond mop of hair as he peaked out, tippy toed, above his classmates to spot me.

"Mom, this is fun!" I heard it alot this afternoon. And I am thankful.


First stop was ice cream. Chatting. Letting him pick where we would sit {outside, of course!}  and which way the conversation was steered.

I am thankful for one on one time with my boys. I have big plans of making this a very regular thing with each of them!

 

Oh this boy.  This ice cream on his face, never a dull moment, full of life little man. He makes my heart melt. 

It's an interesting thing to experience the different kinds of love for each little one God has brought into our family. Certainly not more or less love, but yes, different styles, different flavors, if you will.

My love for K is protective and soft. Nurturing. As if I posses a miracle and must treasure it deep in my heart.

My love for Noe is giggly and sweet. Quiet and consuming. He has always been a comforter; compliant and naturally affectionate.

My love for Kai is this mommy/baby I-want-to-chew-on-your-chubby-cheeks-and -get-a-euphoric-high-from-inhaling-your-head kind of love. So deep. So connecting and entwined multiple times around my heart.

But Jay.... My love for him is kind of fierce. Fierce like a fire in my heart. Like he can push my buttons more than anyone else...

He is very similar to me in many ways. And I think this colors the style of love I have for him. Oh boy do we butt heads sometimes.... what a love, what a heart wrenching, rollercoaster, big love. 

It started in the womb. I was 5 weeks prego when I found out. There was elation and fear {alot}.

And then he came and he wasn't what I expected. I can only imagine I wasn't what he expected either.

He would cry. I would cry. He would cry. I would cry.

I would paste a smile on my face. I would meet his needs. But when people would leave, or the lights would go out. I cried. And cried. And cried...

The only time he didn't cry was when he was nursing or sleeping.

And I Loved that little blond headed boy with every fiber of my being. It was a  Love born out of this desperate collision of reality, motherlove, extreme lack of sleep, post partum hormones gone crazy,and a huge helping of God's infinite grace.

And that is how it became fierce.

And then one day that yowling, red, tense, little bundle of baby boy looked up in my eyes with his big blue ones, and he smiled.

And something happened; I started liking him.

My Jay. My chubber-boo. My Jay-kee-poo.  My Bay-Jay. Yep. I'm thankful for him.

 Fierce love is good.

We had a lovely afternoon!

Ice cream, great talks, and hair trims at my salon.

What could be better?!

Seriously, this was his first haircut not done by me or Dave. :)

It's still long. He instructed her specifically how he wanted it. And keeping it long was part of his instructions. But, it is trimmed up and he is oh-so-handsome-as-ever.

Today: beyond thankful for our third born, seemingly second born, who has taken over many first born characteristics in our fam.

{love my Jay}

30 Days of Thankfulness; Day 14 {Thankful for his mom}

Today: I am thankful for the helpful spirit of my mother in law.

When Dave signed up to re-enter college over a year ago, we found out the only night that would work for him to attend this program, geared towards working adults,  was each  Monday night.

-Might not sound like a big deal. To me, it was.

See, Monday nights have been very special to me for about 4 years now. This is the night that I go do my volunteering at a local crisis pregnancy center. Not only has this been the source of significant growth and ministry opportunity in my life, but I have formed bonds with the people I minister along side of that are of family material. It wouldn't work for me to volunteer any night other than Monday, because they aren't open in the evenings any other night.

We had some tough conversations. I learned some important lessons about supporting my husband whole heartedly. I prayed about my heart and attitude. I realized that no matter what ministry I am in, my ministry as standing behind my husband and making it possible for him to do what he is called to is the most important.

And right on the cusp of stepping back from my ministry for a season, Dave's mom told us that she would come over every Monday night to watch our boys.

So that he could go to school.

And I could continue volunteering.

And I don't really know if she could ever fully comprehend what that has meant to us.

The boys love it. They get grandma time every week. They know when Monday rolls around that they have a treat waiting for them in the afternoon and evening.

For me it has meant so much.

It has meant a continuation in a ministry where God has showed himself to me in ways I previously did not know him.

It has been a nice break from the mommy routine.

It means that I don't really notice the extra evening apart for Dave and I, because we are both busy, out doing what we know we are supposed to do anyway.

For the past 13 months, other than times she has been out of town, My mother in law has shown up at 3:00 every single Monday.

She did today too. And I am thankful. Very, very thankful.

When I left the house Kai was squealing and running around the house with grandma. Noe was grinning. The other boys weren't home from school yet, but had plans of reading books and telling stories to grandma.

When I got home the house was quiet. They were tucked snuggly in bed. Dishes were in the dishwasher.

I had the opportunity to be out in the community, meeting the needs placed before me.

I talked to a young couple tonight about the upcoming ultrasound for their first baby. I answered questions and made reassurances.

I have learned more from this ministry than any knowledge I could ever impart to the clients who walk through the doors of the Center for Women.

What a blessing.

30 Days of Thankfulness; Day 13 {Thankful that He is our glue}

Today: I am thankful that we know marriage is work and that Dave and I are both willing to roll up our sleeves and dedicate ourselves to that work.

I am thankful that even in the uncomfortable "off" moments of "us", we know that ultimately we are united.

Ups and downs are plenty over here in our household.

I am always thrown off when there is this sweet smooth sailing, all seems to be wonderful with "us", and then suddenly there is an unexpected derailment.

There's this feeling of marital whiplash.

*shudder* I don't like it. 

Today there were smiles,

and church,

and busyness,

and then words,

a look,

hurt feelings,

defensiveness,

escalating emotions,

....and then that feeling that follows, which I can only describe as "yuck".

Today: I am thankful that Jesus is our glue.

Without Him how tempted we would be to neglect the work.

30 Days of Thankfulness; Day 12 {Thankful for help}

Today: I am humbled and grateful for people who care about our family.

To take hours out of their weekend...

To get dirty (seriously, all over body + eyes, nose, and mouth gritty, dirty) and dive into physical labor...

For our family.

Thankful doesn't even begin to describe it,

but I am,

so it will.


We have a wood burning furnace outside. We heat our entire home with it. It also has an element that we have added to our water heater, and we no longer have to use electricity to heat our water.

Free heat and hot water? What could be better??

Welllll.... It is very wonderful. But, alot, alot, alot of work {free is a relative term I suppose}.

Every year we try to fill a little shed, that sits next to our house, with fire wood. Usually Dave will work away at this task an hour here and an hour there, in the evenings after work.

It takes a while. Lots of cutting, stacking, loading, and unloading wood.

Once the shed is completely full, we are pretty set for the winter.

The shed is usually full  by November.

We live in Michigan. Not having at least several rows of wood in the shed by November is recipe for anxiety. Especially for Dave...

This year Dave is a full time student. He happens to be in a stressful accounting class.

This morning, November 12, the shed looked like this.

Empty.

And then this happened:

And this:

And by afternoon the shed looked like this:

Full.

Completely full.

Kind of like our hearts.

I literally could watch this burden melt away from Dave's shoulders as the day wore on.

He's a provider. He works hard. This year has been different for him, and I know it has been hard for him to feel behind in some areas.

This was really big for us.

30 Days of Thankfulness; Day 11 {Thankful for delightful snow flakes, and pausing to let gratefulness sink in}

The first snow of the year came yesterday.

Oh their faces... the joy and awe. I don't think Kai remembered the fluffy little flakes from a year ago. He was no less than thoroughly delighted.

And I am thankful.

Today: my heart feels extra full. I am grateful for an evening carved out for my man and going out with friends to a JJ Heller concert.

I am thankful for our warm home, and the way it almost seems to smile a welcome when I return to it.

I am thankful for the joy and delight that I live as I watch my boys experience it.

I am grateful for that moment last night when we slowed the scurrying around. It's like a dance that is complicated and too high tempo for me to keep up with; the after dinner clean up. So, we paused. Dave just held me for a moment. I think he knows that some times to get me to slow down, he has to physically stop me...

I told him that I was so happy, and it was truth.

He's is in a class that is stressing him out.

I am working hard to complete photos in a timely manner.

We are preparing for winter, and there is much wood cutting/loading/stacking to be done.

The windows of time that we have to see eachother have only narrowed of late.

BUT - I am thankful. I say that in complete authenticity.

If I were to wait until things settled down... well, that's not happening is it?

The key to true contentment is finding it *here*. Right now, right in the yuck, and the tough, and the fast paced.

Pause.

And be thankful.

It's working.

30 Days of Thankfulness; Days 9 & 10 {Thankful for friends and for breakfast that I was served}

Yesterday: I had a long post being written in my head. It was about how incredibly thankful I am for friends. How relational I am, how much I long for community, how I went through a lonely time period about 18  months ago and how God brought me out of that in the neatest ways.

It was very sweet, and it fit so nicely in the thankfulness posts.

But I literally only have a five minute window to do this, and until technology moves forward to mind reading computers or I have more time... the post being written in my head will have to stay there. :)

*** I have to interrupt this post to write something I am thankful about this very minute!!

We have electricity. 

I got home from mom2mom this morning and our power was off. I don't know how long it had been off, but the estimated restoration time was over two hours from now, so I am one happy girl!!

I just thought this was super fitting for my thankful post. Electricity is amazing and far too often taken for granted.

{Thank you Jesus}

That is all***

Yesterday I was struck once again by how thankful I am for like minded friends. I spent the morning with Rachel, and the evening teaching awana with some other friends.

This morning I went out to breakfast with my mom2mom group; eight ladies who I get to hang out with every Thursday morning and share the good, the hard, and the crazy of motherhood with.

Today: I am very aware of, and so thankful for, the amazing women that God has placed in my life. They encourage me, pray for me, and make me laugh. (definitely a longer post coming someday about how very much this means to me!)  

Today: I am thankful for the privilege of some one else making me breakfast, serving it to me, and cleaning it up. ;) Every now and then, that is just a beautiful thing to this mommy...

And can I just say wow to Roxy's cafe?? Sweet little place. All you locals should check it out! I definitely will not need to eat for the rest of the day after my little visit there!

Today: I am thankful for our small group. It is hard for 5 families to clear their schedules twice a month to meet. But it is important, and we have tried to protect our time to make it happen. I'm thankful to be meeting with these dear families tonight and discuss chapter 1 of Crazy Love.


And now, I must decide to be thankful for all of these wonderful dishes that need washed and wonderful clothing that needs folded. :)

30 Days of Thankfulness; Day 8 {Thankful for Tuesdays}

Ah Tuesday, how special you are becoming to me...

Today: I am thankful that I learned a few things about packing my schedule and facing burn out over the last few months. Mostly, I am thankful that through some wise re-prioritizing, rescheduling, and decision making, I have been able to make Tuesdays a bit of a reprieve day for myself. We all need a day of rest. When that can happen may be unique to each one of us. I am thankful that it is beginning to happen for me. On Tuesdays.

Today: I am overflowing with thankfulness that I have  someone doing life with me.The sweet companionship would stand alone as blessing enough for a lifetime, but today I am just so grateful for the help I have through all of life's demands.

The time he took with K's homework tonight... the extra time with printing out a number chart, explaining it all slowly, so much patience.

Getting their pajamas on, taking them up to their beds, praying with them. This is of more value to me than just about anything I can think of at the moment. I am so grateful.


Today: I am grateful for the quiet of a gray misty day. Warm beverages, soft blankets, and hours of photo editing. What a great feeling to be productive, while relaxing and doing something I love!

{Grateful}

Today: The sweet sounds of a preschooler and first grader quoting their poems and songs for thanksgiving plays still ring in my ears. Even if I was trying to catch a few minutes of quiet... in the bath tub... and their zealous performances had to take place in my once silent sanctuary.

I recognize the blessings for what they are. I could complain, but that would not be fun at all. :) Instead, they are being added to my grateful lists. Those sweet voices. Those amazing capacities to learn, memorize, and giggle alot in the process.

{Find the silver lining}

30 Days of Thankfulness; Day 7 {Thankful for hope, friends, and serving}

Today: I am thankful for that little unpretentious place down the road and around the bend, where a part of my heart is. ...Grateful for those few minutes, while running errands, when I stepped onto that familiar ground and saw our last name carved in stone.

Overflowing thanks to Jesus for the healing that allows me to stand beside the grave of our little boy and smile... feeling so much hope, so much joy, so many things I thought I would never feel again on that cold day when we stood in that exact spot, over 9 years ago.

I am thankful for music. Today I edited photos to the smooth sounds of Adelle, Natalie Grant, Paul Baloche, Newsboys and Sanctus Real.

I am thankful for friends and birthdays to celebrate them.

I am thankful for coffee and cheesecake. 

I am so grateful for a place to serve. To volunteer my time in a ministry that I believe in 100%.

I am thankful for my husband, and the sweet ways that he takes the time to know me, and love me.

I am thankful that in the midst of our passing one another in the 5 minutes that we actually saw each other today, he passed me a mocha frappe {and a kiss}.

I am grateful for a sweet, reliable, and fun babysitter for the boys

So many times today I thought about my "thankful list". And it brought such a smile to my face - because it kept getting bigger and bigger.  Of course my mental list didn't quite make it to the blog, because mental lists are very fleeting for me, but still - the gratefulness in my heart is growing.

I am more aware. That is a very good thing.

And now, I am grateful for my bed. My pillow and down comforter. :) The day has been so full... and my eyes are simply not going to stay open.

30 Days of Thankfulness; Days 5 and 6 {Thankful for the weekend!}

Weekends are just lovely. Most of the time they mean more relaxing.

More Dave time.

Less rushing from place to place.

Sleeping in is kind of rare at any point in our lives right now, but some times - some few and far between beautiful times, weekends can mean that too.

I'm thankful for this weekend, which is now coming to a close.

Thankful for: Clean floors.

Boys willing {eager even!} to push a vacuum and scrub with a mop. Does it mean things got done in a timely manner? - You bet your leftover Halloween candy that is not the case. 

But my floors are clean. ;)

Thankful for: Clean laundry.

Neat stacks of more clothes than one family would ever need, on the back of my love seat.

The feel of Dave's crisp, clean work shirts right out of the dryer. I smile when I put those blue colors around a hanger in our closet. I am thankful that he is employed. That's not a small thing right here, right now. No small thing at all.

I am thankful for his willing heart when it comes to work. He provides for us so lovingly.

Thankful for: People who trust me to capture images of their families in photographs. I count it a privilege. The two photo shoots I did this weekend produced sweet and beautiful images. I pray for the families as I edit each photo. -A privilege. I am thankful.

Thankful for: My church family. They really are just that; my family.  Not every one has that sense of community where they worship. I am thankful that I get to learn with, worship along side of, and be challenged  by many amazing people.

Thankful for: The extra hour {this may be one of the first times that I actually took advantage of it, instead of thinking "Oh, we have an extra hour, I'll just stay up later and all will be great!" - only to face exhaustion instead of the extra rest I could've gotten}.

Thankful for: The new week about to start.

Lunches are made, waiting in backpacks for the morning rush.

Coffee is ground, and coffee maker is on a timer to be piping hot and ready in the early am.

Babysitter is lined up for my afternoon of volunteering at the Center for Women and my evening of camera club {very excited to learn more about my external camera flash from a professional!}. I'm sure there will be many thankfuls to add tomorrow.

-And can I just say that this daily thankful list practice has been very good for my soul? Yes it has.

{Count your blessings}

30 Days of Thankfulness; Day 4 {Thankful for daddy/son bonding and completing things I start}

Today: I am thankful for a day off from school for my Jay and K.

For turning off our alarms and sleeping in a bit {Oh glorious...}.

For happy boy giggles on the way to preschool.

For a brilliant sun rise that made my heart swell.


Today: I am grateful for Dave's flexible work schedule.

For an impromptu "take your son to work" day for Jay... and the grin I will never forget when I dropped him off with Daddy.

For a shopping list emailed off, and a husband willing to do the "big shopping" with two littles {wow...}.

I am thankful for time with K and Kai.

For our "toast, movies, and candy party" .


Today: I am grateful for planning, and scheming, and dreaming. I've been doing lots of it.

I am also glad to be a part of something bigger than myself. A plan for my life that is unfolding in a surprising, hard, incredibly rewarding, and stretching way.

I am so thankful for God's power helping me to follow through with things I planned/committed to do this year.  I struggle greatly with discipline. I struggle with follow through. I give up on stuff. I procrastinate.

I have made this a matter of prayer, And guess what??! It has really helped {*gasp*}.

Two things in particular that come to my mind are the reading through the Bible plan that I started on January first this year and the photo a day project I really wanted to do. Both things are on track. That's big for me.

The pictures are obviously not as big of a deal as the Bible reading, but both were things that I wanted to start, continue, and not get discouraged if I fell behind on. I have missed some days. Several actually. But I have learned to either start where I left off, or jump in to get caught up. Like I said: big.

{Don't forget to thank Him for your blessing today!}

30 Days of Thankfulness; Day 3 {Thankful that my head is on straight-ish}

Today: I am thankful for our chiropractor. Thankful that he was able to schedule me in, just a few hours after I called.

Something went horribly wrong during the hours of sleep last night. Perhaps my dreams were more brutal than I remember, but regardless, when I awoke I could not move my head to the left with out nauseating pain.

So, of course my thankful list will begin with Mr. Chiropractor. He adjusted, twisted, and cracked until finally he announced, "Well, I think that is all that I can do while still keeping your head attached".

Well thank you sir. For not, you know, removing my head.

And on that note, can I just say that I am SO thankful today that my head IS attached to my body?! I do not even exaggerate when I say that if it were NOT attached, I would surely forget where I placed it and certainly not remember to reassemble it with my body. Just ask my husband. He would so agree with that statement. Except he wouldn't. Because then I would get sulky and pout, "What are you saying about me? That I forget stuff??!" ;)

{Today: I am very grateful for a wonderful, patient husband... ;)

Today: I am also grateful for my Mom2mom group. We are a smaller group this year than we have been for the past couple of years, but still a great encouragement to one another. My Thursday mornings are very sweet due to these ladies.

Today: I am so thankful that my husband is making a glorious "breakfast" supper. The bacon is crackling, the waffles are steaming, the orange juice is chilled, the eggs are frying... One of my very favorite meals.

Signing off to join my breakfastdinner making husband.

{Be thankful}

30 days of Thankfulness; Day 2 {Thankful for the good, the tough, and the candy of today}

Today I am thankful that when I got to school and realized that I did not have K's walker in the back of my van,

a) The walker was in Dave's truck, at his work, just a mile away

&

b) K is walking very well, without the walker, when someone holds his left hand.

Today I am thankful that both Kai and Noe are taking a really nice, long, restful nap (not quite the norm around here these days).

I am thankful for a generous husband, a new camera, the bright sunshine, the nurturing of a grateful spirit, wonderful friends, supper already made, worship team practice tonight, and Halloween candy to steal...  ;)

Day 2 - you have been a pleasure so far.

30 Days of Thankfulness; Day 1 {Thankful for Surrender}

 

image credit here

I am joining in a wonderful November tradition of many bloggers and will be blogging what I am grateful for ever day in the month of November.

Today I am extremely thankful that God cares about every detail of my life. I am thankful that I don't have to waste my time worrying, burning up minutes of my life with anxiety, and taking my own life by the reins.

This seems to be a lesson I am needing to learn daily in this season of my life.

I am thankful for the Lord's patience with me as I learn not to fight, but to surrender wholly and completely to Him. 

This song is pretty "old school", it was around when I was a young teen *gasp*, But lyrically expresses where I am at right now, to a T.

 I Surrender All
I have wrestled in the darkness of this lonely pilgrim land
Raising strong and mighty fortresses that I alone command
But these castles I've constructed by the strength of my own hand
Are just temporary kingdoms on foundations made of sand

In the middle of the battle I believe I've finally found
I'll never know the thrill of victory till I'm willing to lay down
All my weapons of defense and earthly strategies of war
So I'm laying down my arms and running helplessly to Yours

I surrender all my silent hopes and dreams
Though the price to follow costs me everything
I surrender all my human soul desires
If sacrifice requires that all my kingdoms fall
I surrender all

If the source of my ambition is the treasure I obtain
If I measure my successes on a scale of earthly gain
If the focus of my vision is the status I attain
My accomplishments are worthless and my efforts are in vain

So I lay aside these trophies to pursue a higher crown
And should You choose somehow to use the life I willingly lay down
I surrender all the triumph for it's only by Your grace
I relinquish all the glory, I surrender all the praise

I surrender all my silent hopes and dreams
Though the price to follow costs me everything
Well I surrender all my human soul desires
If sacrifice requires that all my kingdoms fall
I surrender all

Everything I am, all I've done, and all I've known
Now belongs to You, the life I live is not my own
Just as Abraham laid Isaac on the sacrificial fire
If all I have is all that You desire
I surrender all

I surrender all my human soul desires
If sacrifice requires that all my kingdoms fall
That all my kingdoms fall, that all my kingdoms fall
I surrender all
Clay Crosse